Do you have a good life but can’t seem to fully enjoy it?
I hear this from amazing women all the time…
“I have so much to be grateful for! Why can’t I just be happy?”
If you ever think this too, it doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. It’s just a sign of incongruence.
With incongruence, your inner reality doesn’t match your external experience.
In your life that can show up as…
…Putting on a happy face and being positive when you’re really actually exhausted and irritated.
…Knowing what healthy foods to eat but not sticking to eating them.
…Appearing confident to others but inside struggling with low self esteem, doubt and not feeling good enough.
…Wanting to feel light and joyful but instead feeling weighed down and stuck.
And a host of other inconsistencies.
(To find out more about the incongruent qualities that could be affecting you, download The Congruence Code Accelerator).
The problem with being incongruent is that it not only creates an internal sense of discomfort and dis-ease, which often manifests as anxiety, chronic pain and addiction, but it also holds you back from being the real, true you.
Then, the cost of not being authentically YOU creates more anxiety, discomfort and dis-ease, which can throw you into the vicious cycle of addiction, obsession or self sabotage.
So what do we do?
If you sense that you may have some incongruence in your life, that’s a good thing!
Why?
Because it means that you are already doing the first thing you need to do to become congruent:
Recognize what in your life is not congruent.
Recognizing what is not congruent is a powerful exercise in honesty and humility.
Honesty allows us to blast through the denial, delusions and distractions that can often cloud our ability to make real change.
Humility gives us the ability to get over our false pride that tells us we’re stupid, weak or that we’ll be judged, so that we can get the help we need on where to start and what to do.
Recognizing what in your life is not congruent is sometimes the hardest step for successful women because a lot in our life is good, so we feel guilty or ungrateful pointing to the things that aren’t working.
Here’s what’s important to understand. Getting honest about what’s not working right now is not the same as being ungrateful.
Getting honest and recognizing what’s incongruent is helping you to get real with what’s blocking you from feeling more grateful and enjoying your life.
Something else that’s important to understand about the path of becoming more congruent is that wanting to have more congruence doesn’t mean that you have to be falling apart right now.
Your life could be 80% wonderful, and you could still want more freedom, peace, lightness, confidence, connection and joy.
If you find yourself in that camp, great! There’s even more amazingness in store for you and your life!
Have a read through The Congruence Code Accelerator and see what congruent and incongruent qualities ring true for you right now.
This inquiry isn’t designed to get you thinking negatively about yourself. (In fact negative thinking is one of the incongruent qualities you’ll read about in Gateway 2 and Gateway 6).
Rather, recognizing where you’re currently living incongruently can help you to get clarity on where to focus so you can come into greater congruence, alignment and freedom.
To get more tips on how to be congruent, check out next week’s email and join us for a live congruence conversation in The Congruence Collective Facebook Group today April 11 at Noon PST.
I’ll be sharing 3 tips to come into more congruence so you can have the confidence to be authentically all of you.
(If you miss the live convo, you can catch the recording) 🙂 Join here.
I’ll see you there.
In dedication of all of you,
xoDeb